The Snub

So, it happened again.


I don't want to sound like a Cleveland cry-baby but our beloved Cavs were eliminated in the Eastern Conference finals. Boo hoo. When they lost game one to Orlando I started mentally preparing myself for that eventuality so I've almost come to terms with it at this point. I mean, of course we weren't going to the finals, come on. All the experts picked the Cleveland Lebrons to end our 200+ year championship drought and take home the biggy... so naturally we had to F that up. That's life, let's move on. Besides, I'm not here to have a pity party because I've already wasted like 4 days intermittently crying and having tourettes-syndrome like swearing fits. But you probably don't need to hear anymore about that.


No, my friends, instead I'd like to take a minute to discuss what I've come to refer to as "the snub".


You see, after the Cavs terribly depressing loss in game six, ending our dream of an NBA championship, (and causing me to complete my first legitimate "power hour" since college - rage drinking at it's best!), Lebron did what I would imagine any normal person would want to do and stormed out of Amway arena without saying boo to anybody.


Fuck the press, Fuck Howard, Fuck Van Gundy and Fuck TurkeyGlue, Lewis, Alston and the rest of those sharp shooting mofos who could hit a three point shot even if I kicked them square in the balls .7 seconds before handing them the ball.


The man was tired, he was beat up, he was pissed... but most of all, he was a poor sport.


Look, I love Lebron. I have actually fantasized about him during sex. That is not a lie, it happened like 8 days ago. I am thrilled that he plays in Cleveland and for once we have an absolute super star of our very own. A home-town hero so to speak.


But let's call a spade a spade, walking out of that arena without at least shaking the hands of the other players was poor sportsmanship. And it's not like Wally Sczerbiak storming out- I mean who gives (the man threw two air balls for Christ sake). We're talking about the biggest super star in the league, just waltzing right the fuck out of there. Of course it did not go unnoticed.


So now, to add insult to injury, we've got people calling Lebron out for this uncharacteristic display. And that's what has me the most upset; not that he was unsportsmanlike (for shame!) but that his unsportsmanlikeness was so un-like him.


Leborn James is a class act. He is wise beyond his years and the embodiment of a team player. And for all you haters out there (jealous much?) take a look at the stats. The proof is in the pudding, there is no valid argument against James here. (You can keep arguing that James is overrated but you will sound like an uneducated nincompoop... which I'm guessing is what you are.) (And you are jealous as shit.)


So to have him soil his amazing season, his MVP winning season with a display like this makes me sad. I understand why he did it, but I wish he hadn't because I know he's so much better than that. And that's all I can say. This too shall pass.


The good news is this- I have confidence in Lebron James and the Cavs, just like everyone who truly takes time to watch the man play his game. He will bounce back, he will overcome and he will win his championship ring. I just hope he's in Cleveland when he does.


And Lebron, a piece of advice. Cause I've been there, ok? I played rec league, girls slow-pitch softball for like 12 years. Not exactly the NBA playoffs but we had some pretty hard core rivalries. And when we lost to one of them (which we inevitably did, we were terrible) we always shook hands. The trick is, hock a big fat loogie in your hand first. Then see who gets the last laugh.